Tuesday, October 12, 2010

It's Awesome to Watch The Game From the Press Box!

Many people think it would be an incredible experience to watch a professional football game from the Press Box. And it is. Just not for the reasons you think.

First of all, the nicest people you see all day long are the people working the hardest and respected the least by the people with whom they'll come in contact. They're the security detail that check your credentials upon entry into the facility and ensure that you're not packing heat or transporting dangerous materials. And they do it with a smile!

Then you interact with the nattily-attired and pleasant Red Coat ambassadors of Reliant Stadium who guide you to the access-controlled elevators to whisk you away to the 8th level that contains the broadcast booths for radio (T.V. is on 3), coaches' booths, and 3 rows of press box seating for roughly 250 credentialed media and the Houston Texans communications and public relations department.

As you step off the elevator you sign in and get situated at your assigned seating, which is set up according to where you fall within the Houston Media Aristocracy. Ranking highest, of course, is Big Mac, flanked by his beautiful maiden and court of loyal lords. They sit front row, 50-yard line.

It is from there that the palpable pettiness of Junior High School raises its pathetic head as people jockey for status and respect from one another that no one is willing to give but all so hungrily seek.

Pre-Season TV dwarfs dressed with wardrobe as if an "extra" somewhere between Urban Cowboy and Saved by The Bell pretend to be above the excitement of attending and enjoying privileged access at one of only 16 games the world's most compelling sport is presenting. Bitter failed comedians perpetrating program directors sulk and skulk. Faltering 2nd and 3rd rate sports radio hosts desperately scan the room to find someone else transfixed by their presence, while failing miserably to appear aloof. Oh, and they speak just a little too loudly to ensure that everyone can hear them as they comment on everything from the complimentary fare to their views on the previous day's college games to what they think would be a terribly original headline to encapsulate either the play that just transpired or the entire game.

And national media that may be on hand chuckle under their breath at the ridiculousness they observe. But at least they don't look on them with disdain as is the case from Houston Texans staff that if their team is winning, question your existence and right to be there covering the team...but if their team is losing, want to kick everyone out of the party they wish they didn't have to host in the first place.

But, other than that...it's Awesome to watch the game from the Press Box!

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